Wow, I have earnestly prayed that this book gets into your hands. I believe that God has a great future for you that is the reason He wants you to have a super spouse who will join you navigate through His plans for your life.
Marriage is one of the equipment you need not only for success but to experience a fun-filled life on earth, erecting monuments that would represent legacies on earth while you are gone.
Marriage can be enjoyed. Yes, it can help you build a strong niche and achieve great relevance. It depends on the foundation you are putting up today. You can come into marriage the way you are. You can also decide to work and put yourself in splendid shape – In order not to come into marriage the way you are.
Desiring that a partner should love you the way you are is laughable. This myth has developed into an erroneous ideology, especially among young women. It doesn’t hold water in marriage. Intelligent people don’t commit themselves to nonsense. Such ideology possesses destructive tendencies.
Coming into marriage the way you are is a choice to fail. But working yourself and transforming who you are into who you ought to be is a responsible decision. We come to God the way we are but we come into marriage prepared. If you don’t, failure becomes inevitable.
Your life is your responsibility.
Foundation is the extra work builders undertake before the building springs up. When it is not properly laid, storms become noticeable. The house that was run aground by storms lacked the touch of a skilled builder. It is only a good foundation that can demystify storms – A bad one makes it obvious.
When we fail in our responsibilities, storms become powerful elements. But storms are not the cause of our ordeal – We are.
Just as a house that is built to last needs depth before height, marriage requires depth before height.
To have a solid marriage that will become a hub of fun and the theatre of legacies, couples must first invest in depth before chasing height. Height may appear fanciful and attractive but without depth, it’s a mere mirage.
Depth is costly but it is worth the sacrifice.
Building depth starts from your singlehood; what you are doing now with your life counts a lot. If you are not consciously building yourself for the future you’re dreaming about; the kind of partner you desire to be, the type of marriage you hope to have, and the type of family you dream of, then you are wasting your time.
The foundation you’re not laying now is the foundation you will never lay. The foundation you are not building today is the failure you’re unconsciously orchestrating tomorrow.
Marriage is a divine privilege to partner and share your life with another. Partnering and sharing life is a beautiful and sacred journey, that shouldn’t be taken lightly.
It doesn’t make any sense to plant seeds without first cultivating the land. It is good to build a house, but it is wise to start such a building with a foundation. Too often, people step into unfamiliar field without any preparations. Success is a well-thought-out event, which only occurs when preparation meets opportunity.
An unfamiliar field like marriage requires adequate training and preparation. Success becomes a mirage when we fail to dig deep before building height. Stepping into marriage without the necessary preparation, training, and self-awareness is an act of foolishness.
Preparation for marriage is about two individuals coming together with the right foundation, values, skills, and mindset. Self-awareness and personal development are essential tools for building a strong and lasting union. They are necessary tools required in marriage; without them, it’s difficult to handle the inevitable challenges within marital relationship.
This book, “Before You Say I Do”, is about marriage preparation. It is designed for singles; to help young people who are trusting God for a great future in marriage understand that life before marriage shouldn’t be spent in frivolities. That’s the reason “Before You Say I Do” is written.
“Before You Say I Do” teaches the importance of preparation, pinpointing the skills young people have to acquire before taking marital vows.
Marriage is not about finding the right partner; it’s about becoming the right partner. Thus, this book emphasizes the fact that a successful marriage starts with you. It outlines the necessity of personal growth, emotional intelligence, and commitment to self-awareness.
It’s only a partner who is sound mentally, emotionally, and spiritually that can contribute to the health of a relationship. Sick people stay in the wards of a hospital because they need a doctor.
Marriage is meant for healthy people because they are the one divine providence predestined to connect; they are the only set of humans who can connect meaningfully, imparting the other, positively.
It’s only when you are grown inwardly that you can truly understand yourself and thus, become productive in a relationship. Self-awareness is an asset; it enhances your contribution to the health and success of a relationship. A sick person in a relationship is like adding a bitter pill to a delicious soup or pouring black ink on a white shirt. How messy can that be? If you’re not healthy, stay away from marriage!
Within the chapters of this book, we will together walk around a few essentials singles should abreast themselves with. These will include the necessity of emotional intelligence in a relationship, the need to acquire communication skills, and build capacity for conflict resolution, and much more before you say I DO,
Building a marriage that thrives requires essential tools. Acquiring these tools begins the very moment you decide to become the best version of yourself. It is golden to enter the sacred institution of marriage with the right shape, prepared and poised with the spirit of intentionality.
Because marriage is a lifelong commitment to share your life with a partner, it requires both preparation and continuous growth. Anytime you stop growing, you become obsolete and irrelevant. When you lose your relevance, your significance dies off. Marriage is endangered when a partner is not maintaining relevance by continuously investing in his or her personal growth.
Before walking the aisle to say “I do”, it is important that you close your eyes and meditatively dream of the kind of marriage you desire, the type of partner that fits into your shape, and at the same time aligns with your divine assignment. It is a worthy course to develop yourself along that vision by investing in your personal growth with the intent of building a strong foundation that can withstand the tests of time.
“Before You Say I Do” ends with a well-articulated Self-Evaluation Page, which is designed to help you reflect on your preparedness, inspiring the decision to work on those areas you appear vulnerable. This introspective tool will guide you in reevaluating where you are at the moment in your strive for self-development and unveil areas for growth as you prepare for a blissful future in marriage.
Before you say “I do,” make sure you’re ready!